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I don’ know about you but desparately thin women just turn me off. You see them in the magazines and on the TV fashion cat-walk clips, weird designs hanging off walking skeletons. Does absolutely nothing for me other than a twinge of sadness that these women feel it necessary to starve themselves in the name of Fashion. Damn good meal , that’s what they need.

Sure facially and with tons of make-up models are pretty. But when you look at the whole package I still wouldn’t want to take one home for sex. Think of the risks. First of all if you hold her too tight she may snap in two - lay on top of her and you risk crushing her to death. In fact I would worry that the light, sensual touch of my breath could make her explode, splattering bones and flesh all over the bedding - explain that to the police. Assuming then that you lay next to her and strike up a conversation. Politics, or perhaps science, computing, the arts, literature? Most of the models I have met (and I have met a few) are complete self-obsessed air heads.

This brings me nicely to the new MacBook Air - the thinnest and prettiest notebook on earth. All skin and bones and absolutely no brains. A complete Air-Head, like the bozos who will rush out and buy one because its an Apple. MacWorld has just put one through its paces in a lab test (a MacBook Air, not a bozo), and found that its a pretty stupid machine. Heres what they say ..

For this first set of tests, we used a default-configuration MacBook Air powered by a 1.6GHz Intel Core 2 Duo processor with a 4200 rpm, 1.8-inch 80GB parallel ATA hard drive. The MacBook Air’s processor clock speed lags well behind current MacBook (2.0GHz or 2.2GHz) and MacBook Pro (2.2GHz, 2.4GHz, and 2.6GHz) models, and its hard drive is also slower than those used in the other models.

Our tests reveal that the slower processor and disk make the MacBook Air quite a bit slower than the other portables in Apple’s product line. The MacBook Air was also outpaced in our tests by the its closest desktop cousin, the ultra-compact 1.83GHz Mac mini Core 2 Duo.

Of course, the MacBook Air’s appeal is not about blazing speeds, but about small size and weight. However, these tests do give some indication about what level of performance users will have to give up if they’ve decided to forego a MacBook or MacBook Pro for the thin embrace of the MacBook Air.

So I think I will stick with my old MacBook for now. And if my wife is reading this - your bum isn’t big - honest.

Full Test Report